you had better talk to them."
Durham looked awkward. He was nonplussed for a reply at last, and let Maurice slouch off without protest. Next day they met as usual. It had not been a tiff but a sudden gradient, and they travelled all the quicker after the rise. They talked theol-ogy again, Maurice defending the Redemption. He lost. He real-ized that he had no sense of Christ's existence or of his goodness, and should be positively sorry if there was such a person. His dislike of Christianity grew and became profound. In ten days he gave up communicating, in three weeks he cut out all the chapels he dared. Durham was puzzled by the rapidity. They were both puzzled, and Maurice, although he had lost and yielded all his opinions, had a queer feeling that he was really winning and carrying on a campaign that he had begun last term.
For Durham wasn't bored with him now. Durham couldn't do without him, and would be found at all hours curled up in his room and spoiling to argue. It was so unlike the man, who was reserved and no great dialectician. He gave as his reason for at-
tacking Maurice's opinions that "They are so rotten, Hall, every-one else up here believes respectably." Was this the whole truth? Was there not something else behind his new manner and furi-ous iconoclasm? Maurice thought there was. Outwardly in re-treat, he thought that his Faith was a pawn well lost; for in capturing it Durham had exposed his heart.
Towards the end of term they touched upon a yet more deli-cate subject. They attended the Dean's translation class, and when one of the men was forging quietly ahead Mr Cornvvallis observed in a flat toneless voice: "Omit: a reference to the un-speakable vice of the Greeks." Durham observed afterwards that he ought to lose his fellowship for such hypocrisy.
Maurice laughed.
"I regard it as a point of pure scholarship. The Greeks, or most of them, were that way inclined, and to omit it is to omit the mainstay of Athenian society."
"Is that so?"
"You've read theSymposium?'
Maurice had not, and did not add that he had explored Mar-tial.
"It's all in there—not meat for babes, of course, but you ought to read it. Read it this vac."
No more was said at the time, but he was free of another sub-ject, and one that he had never mentioned to any living soul. He hadn't known it could be mentioned, and when Durham did so in the middle of the sunlitcourt a breath of liberty touched him.
下一个学期（译注：剑桥大学的学年从每年十月间开始。全年分三个学期，每个学期约八个半星期。三个学期分别是米迦勒节学期、四旬斋学期、复括节学期。“下一个学期”指四旬斋学期。）伊始，他们两个人的关系变得亲密了。
“霍尔，在假期里，我差点儿给你写信。”德拉姆一看见莫瑞斯就说。
“是吗？”
“然而写起来就冗长得要命。日子过得糟糕透顶。”
他的语气并不很严肃。于是莫瑞斯说：“有什么不对？吃圣诞节布丁，肚子出毛病了吗？”
不一会儿，他就听出了布丁可以用作寓言，德拉姆家里发生了一起激烈的争吵。
“我不晓得你会怎么说——倘若你不觉得厌烦的话，我倒是想听听你对此事的看法。”
“一点儿也不觉得厌烦。”莫瑞斯说。
“关于宗教问题，我们吵得不可开交。”
这时候，查普曼的到来打搅了他们。
“对不起，我们正在谈话。”莫瑞斯对他说。
查普曼走了。
“你不必那么做，什么时候都可以听我这番无稽之谈。”德拉姆提出异议，然而他更认真地继续谈着。
“霍尔，我不愿意用自己的信仰——或者不如说是缺乏信仰——的问题来烦扰你。但是为了把情况解释明白，我必须告诉你，我是个异端分子，我不是个基督教徒。”
按照莫瑞斯的观点，异端就是邪恶的。上学期在学院所举行的一次讨论会上，他曾发表这样一种见解：倘若一个人对基督教有疑问，也应该有守口如瓶的雅量。然而他对德拉姆只说了句“信仰是个很麻烦的问题，范围太大了”。
“我知道——不是关于信仰的问题，把它撇在一边吧。”他注视了一会儿炉火。“而是我母亲对此事怎样看的问题。半年前——夏天的时候——我就告诉她了，她并未介意。她照例说了些愚蠢的笑话，仅此而已，事情就过去了。我感到欣慰，因为这是我多年的心事。小时候我发现了对我来说有些事比基督教更有益处，从此再也没信过神。当我结识了里斯利以及他那伙人之后，就很想全部说出来。你知道他们把坦诚看得多么重要，这确实是他们的主要着眼点。于是我就向母亲和盘托出。她说：‘啊，是吗？你到了我这岁数，会稍微变得聪明一些吧。’这是我所能想象的最温和的反应了，我欢欢喜喜地离开了家。可是在这次的假期中，这一切又成了问题。”
“为什么？”
“为什么？由于过圣诞节的缘故。我不愿意领圣餐，基督教徒每年应该领三次圣餐一”
“啊，我知道，圣餐。”の本の作の品の由のの網の提の供の下の載の與の在の線の閱の讀の
“过圣诞节的时候，这就成问题了。我说我绝不去，母亲一反常态，用甜言蜜语哄我，要求我领这一次圣餐，好让她高兴。接着她就生起气来，说我会损坏我本人以及她的名誉。我们是本地的乡绅，周围净是没受过教育的人们。然而我所不能忍受的是母亲的最后一句话。母亲说我是邪恶的。如果她这话是半年前说的，我可以接受她的看法，现在不行！为了让我做没有信仰的事，眼下竟用上邪恶啦、善良啦这样一些分量很重的词。我告诉她，我有我个人的圣餐仪式。‘倘若我像您和咱们家的女孩子们参加你们的圣餐仪式那样去参加我的圣餐仪式的话，我的神祗们会杀掉我的！’这话恐怕说得太重了。”
莫瑞斯没怎么听懂他的意思，就问道：“那么，你去了吧？”
“去哪儿？”
“教堂呀。”
德拉姆跳了起来，满脸厌恶的神色。接着他咬咬嘴唇．面泛微笑。
“没有，霍尔，我没去教堂。我认为这是不言而喻的事。”
“对不起——我请求你坐下来。我无意触犯你，我的脑筋太迟钝了。”
德拉姆挨着莫瑞斯的椅子蹲在地毯上。过了一会儿，他问：“你跟查普曼认识很长时间了吗？”
“从公学到现在五年了。”
“噢。”他好像在沉思。“给我一支香烟，替我送到嘴里，多谢。”莫瑞斯以为有关信仰的话已结束了，然而喷出一口烟后，他又说下去。“听我说——你告诉过我，你有母亲和两个妹妹，刚好和我的情形一样。在那场争吵中，我一直想知道，要是你会怎么办事？”
“你母亲肯定和我母亲不同。”
“你母亲是怎样